The Other Kind of Smart: Simple Ways to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence for Greater Personal Effectiveness and Success.

I just got s new manager, and I have to say, I was a bit skeptical about us getting along-–we are so different. Now, after a few weeks of getting to know him, and his personality, I really like him and feel we will work well together. Yet, there are other members of the team who disdain him and want him to leave. So, what makes me different? I believe it has to do with emotional intelligence. 

Most of us are familiar with the emotional intelligence concept—it has been around since the early 80’s. If you are not, it is the ability one has to empathize with others, understand their feelings and their way of thinking, and to control their own feelings. It’s the person everyone usually likes to be around and trusts. 

It’s imperative that we, as HR Professionals, understand emotional intelligence and continually strive to improve it. It is vital to our companies’ and our career success. 

Studies have shown that employees with a high degree of emotional intelligence are more likely to deliver superior results on the job than their peers. Thus, not only is having a high degree of emotional intelligence beneficial to our own careers, it is also helpful in our pursuit of productive and engaged employees. 

The good news is that unlike our intelligence quotient, our emotional quotient can be changed. 

In his book, The Other Kind of Smart: Simple Ways to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence for Greater Personal Effectiveness and Success, Harvey Deutschendorf presents us with simple, and easy techniques for improving our emotional intelligence. These techniques include real-life anecdotes that illustrate how others have changed their EQ and improved their personal and professional success. Moreover, Mr. Deutschendorf ends every chapter with short techniques to help improve our stress tolerance, elevate our emotional self-awareness, cultivate our empathy, enhance our adaptability, augment our assertiveness, resolve our problems easier, and how to be happier. 

Here are some of the techniques found at the end of the “Self-Regard” chapter:

• Run–don’t walk—away from people who put you down or diminish you in any way. Focus on spending time with people you know will be supportive. Do not delude yourself into thinking that you can bring negative people up. It won’t happen; they will drag you down.
• Keep a book of accomplishments. Every week, pick one night and before you go to bed write down in that book everything you have accomplished that week. Don’t forget personal things like: bringing a smile to someone’s face or making someone laugh. Think of things that made you feel good. If you have difficulty remembering an entire week, make a short list each night.
• Ask people you trust and respect, and who know you well, to tell you what they see as your strengths. Sometimes others are able to see attributes we have that we are not able to recognize. 

Since reading The Other Kind of Smart: Simple Ways to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence for Greater Personal Effectiveness and Success. I have been keeping a book of accomplishments. I have found it to be extremely helpful and has made me focus on the things I do well. In addition, it has helped me to reflect on the things I did during the week and consider other actions I could have taken in various situations. It’s very similar to a process recommended by Rhonda Byrne in the book, The Secret. 

Emotional intelligence isn’t some fading fade or only for the social and psychological experts. It is a proven component found in almost everyone deemed successful. As stewards of the “people department” I believe that it is even more important that we, as HR Professionals, have a superior level of emotional intelligence. Again, emotional intelligence is not just about being popular, it’s about knowing ourselves and others. If you feel that you may want to increase your emotional intelligence, then I suggest you pick up a copy of The Other Kind of Smart: Simple Ways to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence for Greater Personal Effectiveness and Success. 

About the Author 

Harvey Deutschendorf is an emotional intelligence coach and has worked in the EI field for over ten years. In addition, he is a Certified Administrator of the BarOn EQi. BarOn EQI, is the first scientifically valid test for emotional intelligence approved by the American Psychological Association.